early Saturday night, 12 March 2005 [2:30 a.m.]
My dearest Keith – it’s 2:30 in the morning – what am I doing still out of bed? I just can’t seem to get to bed anymore until after 1:30 a.m. at the earliest. Your ‘night-owl-ness’ has rubbed off on me. ‘member when you couldn’t sleep in the middle of the night and you’d ‘phone or message me and Ken never knew – LOL! Miss you like oxygen. It’s hard going on, it’s hard facing everything without you. The most special thing (next to my son) in my whole life and you’re gone.I watched "Dances with Wolves" tonight and I’m pretty sure you would have liked it. Kevin Costner’s reddish beard reminded me of yours before you shaved it off.
I downloaded my music library on to the iPod but I haven’t yet figured out how to select from my Playlists – I’ve got a few: Acoustic, World, Fatboy Slim, Classical/Opera – and then there’s my special one: it’s called "Songs for Keith" and, of course, "Rough Boy" is in there.
It’s the twelfth – a month ago I should have been on the plane. And I would have made it to you in time, just in time.
OK, I’m getting upset and it’s far too late. Luckily, I don’t have to work tomorrow. I’ll write again later today.
Missing you so very, very much.
- S.
P.S.: Last night when I went to bed and held you photo, my eyes swam with tears. Looking at you through my tears, your image shimmered and swam. It began to look like a colour negative – the effect was strange and eerie. It was mesmerising and I held on to the picture frame and stared at your image for a long time – I couldn’t take my eyes away.
posted by Susan @ 12:46 am
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