Saturday night, 9 July 2005 [9:15 p.m.]:
Hi, my Keith.Early tonight, aren’t I? I think I’m going to go bed early tonight and it’s going to be cold so here I am.
Honey, I fell asleep in tears last night. Sometimes I just seem to be overwhelmed with feelings of grief – as if someone dashed a bucket of despair or hopelessness over me and it hits me in the same way as having a bucket of water flung over me. One minute I’m OK and the next I dissolve in tears. But I really am so much better than I was! And the overriding emotion is one of thankfulness for you, for your life, for your love and friendship. But, damn, I sure still miss you!
Not much happened today – got up late, did some shopping, went to the Library, toured a gym to see about membership there and watched "Seven Years in Tibet". And now just trying to figure out how to stay warm! Today I held a poinsettia petal on the palm of my hand and they are just so fluorescent a red they fairly glow. So many amazing things to see. If only I could see you.
I’m going to go and send a couple of emails and then have an early night. Thank you for being with me so much lately, KD – it helps, it really does.
‘night, sweetheart.
- Susan
posted by Susan @ 9:30 pm
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