early Tuesday, 5 July 2005 [12:30 a.m.]:
Hey, there, Grizz!Well, in spite of everything, I had a great day today! And again on the way into work I wished I had the camera so that I could take a photo of those silver and gold onion domes on the Russian Orthodox church. Also when I went down to the canteen to get some yoghurt for lunch the lorikeets were going crazy in a gum tree feasting on the pink gum blossoms and it would have made a nice shot for you. Keith, do you see what I see?
I know that you are with me sometimes – I know you were with me last night. I talked out loud to you and I could feel how heavy you felt on the bed. There was a while there that I either couldn’t feel you or when I did you felt completely insubstantial – like a cloud or a puff of air. But last night I felt everything: your regular breathing that soon took up the same tempo as mine, the backs of your knees, your big butt, my breath blowing on the hairs on the back of your neck. Thank you for coming to be with me. Do you do it because you want to do something different for a change or because you know I miss you or maybe because you miss me. I don’t want you to miss me, I don’t want you to ever want for anything – I want you to have every single perfect thing that you want – no matter what it is and where I stand in it. I want you to be happy, Keith, I wanted that then, I want that now.
Got to go – don’t know when the truck will get here with the jacaranda in the morning. The tree that I picked out was a bit shorter then some but had a nice trunk and the leaves on most of the others was a pale yellow-green but this one had nice deep green leaves.
God I miss you! Thank you for the photos – they help so much. And soon I’ll get "the" hat – MY hat!!! Love you heaps, honey –
- Tiger Woman
posted by Susan @ 12:55 am
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