early Thursday morning, 18 August 2005 [12:15 a.m.]:
Keith –It was six months ago today that I got Don’s emails and *A LOT* has happened since then. I bet you’re proud of me (even though I haven’t started doing any research into PV yet). But I know, too, that you’d try to talk me out of some of the situations that I’m in and ask me what the hell do I think I’m doing when I let people just take advantage of me like I do sometimes. You know, Keith, I can be so naïve – I always believe everything everybody says to me. At least you, you wonderful man, never lied to me and I could trust everything you said, no matter how unbelievable they seemed sometimes. I sure miss your stories.
There is something that I have to tell you… I did something today that may mean that I won’t be able to come to BC in November. I put a deposit down on a cattledog puppy – she is so cute! I am going to call her "Ruffie" – for ‘your’ song "Rough Boy" by ZZ Top (I couldn’t exactly call her ‘Keith’ or ‘ZZ’, could I?) Anyway she’s expensive and will put a big dent in what I have managed to put aside for the trip so far. I mean, I have no idea how much the pilot will cost and then I have nobody to stay with meaning big motel bills, and a rental car. But, God, I want to bring those blossoms you loved to you and say goodbye (if I can) and see Kisa. I’d like to see Don, too, but I have no idea if he’d be in it. I am so hoping that you wrote me a letter and that I will eventually get it. I can’t believe it’s taken so long – I bet you can’t believe it either.
I was just sitting here thinking about how you invited me to come and stay at 108. We didn’t know then how sick you were going to get and how soon. I miss you so very, very much and feel cheated just like Ken said. [Sh*t – the first bloody tears in a long while (well, for me anyway).] Keith, I will never, ever forget you. I am trying to keep my Promises – I haven’t done very well on the first one just lately, have I? Be my buddy and help me out, OK? I need a boot in the butt from time to time, I guess.
Love you sweetheart.
- Susan
P.S.: Tonight the moon is mostly full – the lunar cycles are just flying by and seems as if it was only a day or two ago that the moon was a sliver.
posted by Susan @ 12:45 am
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