Saturday night, 6 August 2005 [11:45 p.m.]:
Hey, my Keith.Have to say that, even though I’ve been busy, I miss you heaps. I was thinking tonight that there was still so much that we had to give to each other – I hate the way we ran out of time to do those things we talked about doing.
Graham was horrified yesterday when I said that I didn’t fear death any more since I knew I’d see you when I die. He says that it’s fine for me to believe that you visited me but I can tell he doesn’t believe it at all. I hope he doesn’t lose anyone close to him, but when he does I am sure he will see what I mean. Thank you, honey, for your visits.
I have so much to thank you for! A new way of looking at myself, a remembrance of things of my Michigan youth, of accepting things that were different or that I didn’t understand (like your tatts), of music (how much I have come to love ZZ Top!!! – thank you, thank you, thank you for that), of how you impressed me by being so fair and your childlike wonder that charmed me so. You have come to define what a "man" is for me – you have raised the bar to impossible heights, you know.
I see Venus every night these days: so bright and so constant. I know the pearlescent light that she reflects shines off your face and washes over me. Being in sight of her is to be, again, with you. When I finally arrive "up north" it will be so good to be able to see your star in Ursa Major – I haven’t seen the Big Dipper in a long, long time.
It’s cold and I’m going to read for a bit and then go to bed. I have never stopped missing or loving you in spite of all the things that I have been up to these days and I’m pretty sure that I never will.
I think of your daughter and hope she is well – she must be on summer break right now. The next week will be hard on us all: go to her, Keith, I know she will need you.
Kia kaha –
- Susan
posted by Susan @ 12:15 am
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